Once upon a time there was a dashing, slightly overweight (but not obese according to his BMI chart) twenty smfin year old armchair pundit who held down a full time job at a giant corporation that had a habit of not paying its employees nearly what they're worth, using a cost of living grid for Flordia (where it's corporate parents were based) instead of the common sense thing to do: adjust for the cost of living in his hometown.
But this is not a story of him complaining about how grossly underpaid he and his co-workers are. Oh no. This story starts elsewhere.
Whence upon an early evening he stumbled across an article posted at one of his favorite websites. The article was about a very confused and angry lady by the name of Michelle Malkin (no relation to Lord Voldemort Malkin), who made a recent appearance on a cable news show. On this show, she (in her very "some say" school of journalistc methodolgy and investigation) came up with a theory that Kerry "may or may not have" self-inflicted his wounds in Vietnam.
You can see this video thanks to 1115 at this link.
Shortly thereafter, "some say" she was awarded an honorary doctorate from the Art Bell school of Conspiracy.
Intrigued by this woman's reality ("some say" she was previously a wino who talked to her 25 cats and lived in an alley on the Lower East Side), I decided to do a bit more research on her. The more I read of her politics, theories and policies, the more I enjoyed myself. Her satirical wit is FAR more polished than Pollack. Her language FAR more enjoyable to read than that other humorist (Nan Coulter?!? Ann? eh.) I see on Fox News, Disney Channel and other accredible sources of the ilk.
Later that eve, I was returning my recent stash o' book to the library and I did a bit o' fumbling around the old card catalog (remember those?). Turns out (surprise!) her book Invasion was ready and waiting for me to be checked out.
Seeing very little monetary risk involved, I picked it up.
Other books I checked out this week:
Slowness by Kundera
The Legacy of Albert Kahn by Hawkins Ferry
The Complete Works of O. Henry (1600 pages! yeah!)
Anyways, the first two chapters sort of surprised me. To be "fair and balanced", she takes on the US Government (both Republicans and Democrats alike) and shows the faults in the current border patrol and immigration process. She even goes so far as to sound like something out of F9/11 at times. She makes assessments about the current situation even the most diehard of liberals would agree on: that something needs to be done to help better protect our borders domestically.
However, it's all downhill from there. The rest of the book is highly xenophobic, with a special distaste for the Latin community and those seeking political amnesty. She supports ethnic profiling and the same laws she demands enacted would have affected her own parents chances at becoming natural citizens of the US (her parents were originally from Southeast Asia). It's somewhat disturbing how much hatred is spewed forth for the duration of the book, and I felt somewhat ripped off that there wasn't more depth to her hatred. All in all, if you REALLY wanted to get the gist of the book, you can only read the last chapter and save yourself a few hours in the process. But I wouldn't even go there.
Posted by rob at August 23, 2004 06:39 AM