rob's blog

NEVER AS TIRED AS WHEN I'M WAKING UP

Let it be known that December has been a month where grace has slipped past me. I can't recall any other time this year where I've been as absent and clumsy as I am currently. I have no idea what's wrong with me.

The amount of people inquiring who exactly Nima is threw me off guard, so I went to a few of his friends to get an accurate description of what Nima's all about. This what I came back with:

Reilly Brennan, Director of Car Communications for the World:

"Nima is everything you always thought a frat boy could
be, and actually is.

I was once afraid I would get drilled by him, but then
I realized I wanted him to drill me and all of my
family. Also, he not only drills holes but also
dinners, tasks, routines and inanimate objects.

Further, he wrote me this testimonial:
"Why are you frowning, Rileans?"
"Because I told you to smack that ass
son, not ass that smack."

Jakub Alexander, Ambassador of Electronic Music To Poland, Sonic Crack Dealer:

"Nima is the man in all my American Gladiator dreams that laughs at me while my broke ass nerf grenades don’t ever reach him because of my pathetic throws. He pummels me with tennis balls to the face while I try to go from base to base but then just goes down onto the stage and effortlessly just throws my 120 lb body through one of those Styrofoam mountains."

Will Calcutt, Director of the Hardac Institute of Design, Norway/Detroit/SF:

"Nima is never known entirely to one person. He is like a diamond,
faceted a million times. And each person's perception of Nima is
analogous to a beam of light refracting through him in a unique manner.
So that one may see him as an All American Protagonist of Rowdy
Behavior is indeed a truth, it is merely one truth.

For another beam of light reveals him to be a Persian Inquisitor, with
perfect pitch, capable of gleaning from the more laborious passages of
Rachmaninov an appreciation the most erudite European scholars would,
quite simply, give their right arms for. A third beam of light would
be scattered through the many facets and show Nima to be wild,
capricious and bound only to the whims of his heart.

Everyone knows a facet, or if they are lucky, several facets of Nima.
But the only way to begin to know the multitudes is to understand that
no two people are capable of sharing the Idea of Nima, and that
ignorance is the burden of expectation.

You do know him as the Genius or as the Fool, as the Jovahn or as the
Cripple, as the Fighter or as the Lover; you should know him only as
the Diamond, stubborn to nature's merciless compression and shining in
the California sun."

-----

There's also a theory that Nima is Rex the Dog, but I'll leave that to the experts.

In other news, while homelessness seems to be on the rise, most minimum wage earners in Detroit can barely even afford to maintain a two bedroom apartment. Workers in the D must earn $13-15 an hour to pay rent and utilities in Metro Detroit, which is three times the federal minimum wage.

I think all of those BBE should start saving your pennies, and I'm here to help. Someone who shall remain nameless (but I have a great deal of respect for who happens to be a co-worker) found this fantastic little link which shows you how to gank free cokes from a vending machine. Think about it: one coke a day, that's $30 a month saved from this thrifty little tip. I'm not saying I'm going to do it. Not at all. BUT....I'm not non-endorsing this plan either. Let me know if any of you try it, especially if it works.

Song of the Day. It's time to put the bad vibes and disappointments of 2004 away, and look to 2005 as a fresh start; smelling like clean linen and crisp air.

Posted by rob at December 21, 2004 08:41 AM